Free Kenneth Foster

I know it's been a while since i've sent out a direct message to everyone, but please believe that doesn't mean things aren't happening nor being pursued. Because - they are! Every day! It's just things for me are played on a different field and as i'm sure you all realise the same "hype" that once surrounded my plight is not there because i'm not on death row. Which is understandable. The struggle DOES continue for those that are over there and i wouldn't have it any other way.

But i, as do my closest friends and supporters, understand that my fight is not over. Some may think that we have accepted the life sentence, but we never have and never did even before the commutation. While the life sentence has bridged me over to where i could continue living, it definately is not the final destination. For those that i write on a regular basis they already knew that - for those that i don't - now you know.

What i wanted to do was share a brief outline with you all of what my goals and objectives are for 2010. 2010 is going to be a VERY SERIOUS year for me. It's a year that i'm going to have to focus on and work tirelessly. It is going to have to be the year that paves way for my victory in 2011. While i'm not saying 2011 is going to be the year that i get out of prison (though i don't think it will be many years after that), 2011 has to be the year where certain things are done to lock in that release. And 2010 is the year where the work must be put in to acheive that.

I'm enclosing a concise outline of what i will be focusing on. Some of you know these things and som of you (even ones i write regularly) were never aware of these things. And for those that wish to know more may ask me about it as it would be a blessing to discuss some of my visions with you. One thing that i always vowed was that prison would not keep me from doing my work that i know i am supposed to do. And it hasn't. I've just begun and plan to accomplish a lot more.

While i'm sure some of my personal endeavors will bring a lot of curiosity (like the UJENZI project and the HIV/AIDS awareness), I know many are curious about my plans to go to school. As some know i was in college when i was incarcerated on this case. Well, i do plan to finish my college education. This Unit only offers a 2 year Associates (in a few subjects..... and i will probably focus on Arts-Liberal Arts). To pursue a 4 year degree i would have to transfer to another Unit, and that is something i would dread doing as i am very close to my home (San Antonio... about an hour away) and would not want to make my famioy have to endure those long drives to see me as they did for 10 years going to Ellis and Polunsky which are around 3 hour dries. They've made great sacrifices for me and now i have to sacrifice for them. However, i'm sure they would encourage me to put my education and plight to freedom first. Therefore, my doors not TOTALLY closed to a transfer. At the same time, in 2 years i hope to have my main paths to freedom locked in, therefore i wont have to worry about finishing my degree here. I can finish it out there. So, i'm looking forward to these new events coming up.

Since i left death row MANY things have changed for me. I don't ever like to say they changed for the worse eventhough i may not have liked the change. I have come to recognise (only through feeding my spiritual self) that all things happen for a reason and that we may not understand why certain things are unfolding. So, i embrace all the change with an optimistic attitude. Even for the crops that grow there can be no sunshine without rain to make them flourish. So, through this attitude i have been able to keep on smiling at the things that i have faced. I believe that my success comes from not letting a hurdle stop me nor a sneer nor a hater hold me down. Some people want to see you fail. But little do they know that to keep another person down they have to keep a part of themselves down with it! For those that want to be down, let them be down. I'm with the sky!

For those that are on the frontline with me. I'm going to need you to be ready to move into this next stage of the struggle. You've had a 2 year vacation! It's time to get busy.

Again - just because you don't get a flurry of messages doesn't mean things aren't going on. Stay tuned, keep your eyes and ears open and be ready to act when we need you. Be looking for me - I'm coming full speed ahead! Until then ......

Strength/Vision and success to you all!

Kenneth

2010 Goals and Objectives

* Begin College in the summer semester pursuing 2-years Associates Degree in Arts-Liberal-Arts.

* Pursue locking in a Law Firm to begin work on attaining a sentence/Time Cut (preferably a firm that can also handle attaining Parole).

* Begin networking with State Rep. Terri Hodge on the new bill for January 2011;

Find out:

- What new support we can get behind the bill

- What hindered the bill in Senate in 2009

- What needs to be done to get the bill passed in 2011

* Start organizing families that can speak out for the bill (families im mind: Rudy Medrano, Jeff Woods)

* Work on finding a publisher that can print book number 3: 08/30/07: The Mantra Continues, for release around the beginning of August.

* Work on the UJENZI ART project (www.freewebs.com/ujenziart)

* Work on the WE CAN SURVIVE HIV/AIDS campaign (which will include art/posters/slogans/poetry for bringing awareness to HIV and AIDS.)

The holidays are some of the rare times that prisoners get to enjoy themselves more than others. While the longing for home sets in more we often pull together and be a bit more communal, thus allowing ourselves to deal with the circumstances. The food is better on the Holidays and a bit more, and not to mention all the cooking g and celebrating we do amongst ourselves.

It?s hard to celebrate in prison, but we realize. If we ever abandon being human than we?ll definitely descend into a pit of chaos, depression and insanity. And so while people say your time is what you make it?and we can?t make it a beach vacation?we try to make it bearable.

This was my first Christmas in general population. My first Christmas off death row was spent on close custody, locked in a cell and on lockdown. So, it wasn?t much to talk about. Anyhow, I?ve been and learned the art of inner celebration and joy. Through in a very oppressive situation I still recognize the many blessings in my life. There are not many amerikan holidays that I do recognize (due to my personal beliefs) but Christmas is one that I do, because I embrace Jesus and what he did.

So, I was looking forward to having a good day. And on top of that- I was set to work in the kitchen that day. It was make-up time as far as I was concerned. I?ve been doing a lot of that, by the way. And for those that have been getting contact visits with me they can testify to that.

I woke up that morning and headed to the kitchen with thoughts of sliced brisket dancing in my head. And just my luck would have it we would serve the kitchen workers from the chow hall I worked in. What this means is that my crew would be running the food. (Just as a side note- all kitchen workers get a chance to eat before we feed the entire prison and we are allowed double servings- and the servers of the meal get a little more than double.)

Well, for those that may not know, there?s always some side hustling that goes on in the kitchen. Actually, it goes on everywhere in prison. For those that are unaware and may think it goes on just because the prisoner is delinquent, that?s not always the case. Many prisoners lack outside support therefore don?t get money and when you have a prison system that forces labor upon you without pay that only worsens the situations. So, prisoners must find a way to survive under a system that is not to subjugate them.

Due to the hustling that goes on, prisoners and the chow hall areas are often shook down for items. And since all that good food would be in the kitchen on Christmas day that would take place in full force.

Shortly after we feed all the kitchen workers a shake down crew (of about 5) headed by a Lieutenant named Strolney came in at full force. As they shook down the chow hall they made their way behind the feeding line where we were serving and they began to take all the trays with food on it. What they were taking wasn?t food that was meant to be sold, but food that was meant to be eaten by us (the servers) once we finished cleaning up the chow hall. It was around 9ish and we had to clean the entire chow hall and prepare to serve Christmas meal. So, what we like to do is finish the cleaning then we eats last. It?s more efficient that way. But, this staff failed to understand that.

The Lt. ordered that all the food be taken. When I saw this taking place and saw that no other prisoner was saying anything I spoke up and asked why our food was being taken. In a belligerent tone she responded that it was too much food and that she wasn?t going to allow us to sell this food. In a respectful tone I responded that the food wasn?t for selling, that was food we planned to eat, because we hadn?t yet. When she inquired of we had fed kitchen chow I responded that we had, she replied that we should have eaten then. Of course this is ludicrous, at the time they want. I tried to explain that to her and show her that it?s better (for THEIR time schedule) when we clean first and eat last. She took this simple act of authority and exclaimed (since I spoke up for the prisoners) that I could get a job change and she ordered me to return to my building. There?s no way I was going for that, so I told her I wasn?t leaving because I had done nothing wrong, and that I was only pointing out to her what the situation was. That only infuriated her more and she went into a ridiculous tirade about how she wasn?t allowing us to have ?20 pieces of cake.? That was so insane that I challenged her to show me 20 pieces of cake. At that point she stormed into the main kitchen where the officers had taken the trays and she opened a few of them up. I pointed to the tray that I had made that had 6 pieces of cake on it ? 3 for me and 3 for my co-worker. The Christmas meals include 3 pieces of cake for us, so I pointed out to her that I was due at least 3 pieces of that cake before they threw it away. Well- that seemed to do it for her, because she pulled her handcuffs out and told her officers to ?lock me up.? That means take me to solitary. And that?s exactly what happened.

As the cuffs were being placed on me, I looked at the Lt. and said to her- ?So, you?re going through all of this simply because I ask you a question about the food I haven?t eaten and that I?m supposed to have?? Her only response was ? ?yeah dude, because I?m tired of your shit.?

No other prisoner spoke up and no kitchen officer spoke on our behalf even when they know they allow us to put our food to the side. In truth, any kitchen officer could have stopped that situation from taking place, because that Lt. has no authority in the kitchen. That would be like a mail room officer telling a laundry officer how to do their job. Her only authority is if a security situation is at hand. She has no authority to say where we can place our food or what we can eat. But, what officer is going to stand up for a prisoner, right?!

I was lead to solitary as I verbally protested and when I inquired to the Sgt. ( Sgt. Zamora) why I was being taken to solitary she replied that I didn?t have to know everything and that?s not why I was in prison and that if I didn?t go, force would be used. I could only crack a smile at that. IF SHE ONLY KNEW WHO I WAS AND WHAT I?VE DONE IN USE OF FORCE SITUATIONS! It was tempting, but I allowed myself to be taken to solitary. But, I made sure I let her know that regardless if I?m a prisoner or not, I still have Rights and I would stand for them.

When I got to solitary I was placed in a holding booth. These booths are approximately 3 feet wide and 4 feet long. They stand about 7 feet tall and they have one small stool to sit on. These holding booths are meant for short time occupancy while a holding cell is cleared for you. Well, some retaliation points were in store for me. I made it to the booth before 10am. After I was held for a few hours I began to inquire what they were going to do with me. The solitary officer told me- ?The Lt. said to release you at 6:15 pm.? That almost caused me to fly into a rage. I told the officer that was an abuse of authority and either they?re supposed to house me in a cell or let me go. I asked to speak to the supervisor over solitary. I knew he had no authority over the matter. At this time my body had already began to go sore from standing and sitting in the cramped space, so I sat down Indian style- the only way to relieve some of the pressure. Once the shift supervisor of solitary arrived (an hour later) I knew it was a lost cause because I had a similar altercation with her and another racist officer some weeks before. But, that?s another story.

I was made to stay in that cage until around 5:30 pm that evening, so I did a total of 8 hours in that cage on Christmas day. Merry Christmas to me!

When I was released I made my way back by the kitchen and caught the attention of some of the kitchen officers and I told them that I hadn?t eaten. They knew what took place, so I was given some items to take back with me. Upon returning to the pod I ate that food and called it a night. I wasn?t in the mood for and further celebrating.

I felt the need to share this story for many reasons. Once, as I?ve stated many times already, just because I?m off death row the struggle doesn?t stop. Secondly, I have not relinquished my fire just because I?m off of death row. Let me be clear about this- I GREATLY enjoy being able to walk around, work, and ESPECIALLY get contact visits. But, I cannot change who I am. I cannot change what I feel about people in authority who purposely try to degrade us and make us feel like we are dirt. Sure, there are guys here for bad things. But, not everyone here is a killer or a rapist. There are officers here who when addressing a prisoner will tell them (when they get into a verbal dispute) - ?Just do what I tell you to do. It?s not my fault you raped, robbed, or killed someone.? This is what these ?so-called professional? officers say to people. Professional they are not- they?re more like Hitler Nazi?s. This is not every officer, but many, just like not every prisoner is a sick person. But, this is how they breed officers to treat us. They breed themselves to feel like they don?t have to answer questions. They feel like they can tell us to do things?even things that are NOT rules and policy?without being questioned or resisted. We have rights, regardless. And I won?t relinquish mine.

This is the 2nd occurrence I have had like this where I was sent to solitary for speaking up for myself. I didn?t write about the first one, because it was small and I was let out of solitary about 45 minutes later. It?s true that some officers use that as a ?cool down? process, but this Lt. Strolney used this to try and make a point to me. The only point that she made to me is the same point I?ve BEEN knowing about the system- IT?S OPPRESSIVE AND SEEKS TO BREAK THE HUMAN MIND, BODY AND SOUL!

It?s nothing new to me. I?ve seen worse (little do they know) and they should pray that they never see the best in me, because that would mean full protest mode and they wouldn?t like that very much. The DRIVE spirit will FOREVER live on in me.

I?m stuck between a rock and a hard place. I have to make certain sacrifices to retain my level status. And it?s one of the hardest things I?ve ever had to do, because nothing drills me more that cowardly officers who use their authority to be abusive. They hide behind their uniform. How I will maintain- I don?t know, because as I?ve said... I can?t promise that I?ll always be a G2. I can?t promise that my struggles are forever done. Supporting me is KNOWING these things. Since I?ve been on this unit I?ve done verbal protest, I?ve posted written grievances on this web-site. And I?ll continue. It?s not something that I can stop. At this point in time I am trying to let my pen be mightier than my sword.

The mentality of people that over-see prisons get worse and worse every year. This is why I continue to speak out and ask people to educate themselves to what the Prison Industrial Complex TRULY is.

After all this has been said I must say that it?s a sweet irony to this. While I would have preferred to have had a smooth day I suppose this is just one more lesson of struggle for me. I stopped questioning my obstacles a long time ago. I came to realize that these were my stepping stones, not my stumbling blocks. As I sat in the cramped booth I thought about the people who wouldn?t get presents or wouldn?t even have a full meal. I realized that while I have bad I could have it worse. I wanted the brisket, but tears come to my eyes as I reflect on the unity of pain, frustration, aggravation and rage that surged through my veins and I knew many other strugglers were feeling. More and more my character is defined through the hardships I go through.

?The most generous vine, if not pruned, runs out into many superfluous stems and grows at last weak and fruitless: as doth the best man if he be not cut short in his desires, and pruned with afflictions.?

And after all??. Wasn?t this what Christ captured anyway?

I leave you all with love and fire in my heart. The struggle doesn?t stop, and neither does our victories.

UHURU!

Kenneth ?Haramia? Foster

PS- We?ll see how New Year?s goes ( smile!!!)

8.30.09

Here I am to share a few words to those I love, to those that have stood fighting and to those that just need to know how real it is. I?m sure it?s not hard to understand how hard it is to share the inner-chambers of one?s heart. You think to yourself- who cares? Who will understand? But, for those whose hearts have been forged to fight for the higher causes in life we still seem to do it, regardless, because we know it must be done.

Here I am 2 years after I left death row. I sat back and absorbed and observed my day and I peered deep within myself to try and understand what was going on. This is SO necessary, but I know it?s easier for me to do this than for you all out there dealing with everyday life. But, to understand ourselves is a great power, because when we can do that we can unlock the secrets to the universe. Just look around us at what we?ve made and done. The people who make technology, computers etc. - they have unlocked something. You follow me?

And so I continue to try and unlock the complexities of my own life. I still struggle with my new environment. The Penal System is full of problems that you can?t imagine?some made by us, some made by the system. So, I have gone from one struggle to the next. I?ve gone from the lynch tree to the cotton fields. Oppression takes many shapes. But, I always have that knowledge and strength that was instilled in me from those years on death row- a ?training? that will never leave me.

It?s often hard to compose thoughts that are so chaotic and painful. But, for those that I share with on a regular basis they know that I remain as determined as ever to overcome this situation and uplift as many around me as possible.

I was fortunate to spend my 2nd anniversary off death row with a beautiful friend from overseas. Originally she didn?t want to come on 8.30, because she thought I would rather spend that day with my family. But, as I have come to see, family is not in blood but in bond. And so sometimes a friend is more esteemed than kinfolk. I love so many of my friends more than those I share a bloodline with and so it was a great day to share with someone like her. I ate good (of course); laughed good and made good on this blessing I was given.

Because life moves so much faster out here it?s hard to do as much writing as I used to. But, you can be assured that I am never stagnant and am always brewing up a plan for success and freedom. And when the time comes you?ll all be aware of some of those plans. Our bill didn?t pass this year, but we?ll try again in January 2011, but I may have a trump card before then.

There remains so many fights going on that need to be supported. Keep your eyes on the work of the Campaign to END the Death Penalty (CEDP), because Texas is not going to let up. So lend an ear, a voice or a signature where needed.

In close, in my best tradition, I?d like to leave a poem that I wrote on my 2nd Anniversary off death row. And I?d just like to ask you all for your continual prayers and support and know that every day I give praise and try to make this chance like on never before. So keep your eyes toward me and know that the tide is just beginning to rise.

Love and Struggle

Kenneth

Poem:

the days pass,

I tally the months and

the years begin to pile,

but these memories remain as clear as

what I did yesterday and

they also make me

push for my tomorrows

cause I still feel the

urgency of

living life to its fullest degree,

because sometimes we take for granted

the smallest things that

end up meaning the most.

I said it once

and I’ll say it again-

I REALIZE

I HAVEN’T SHOOK

DEATH ROW:

the years of solitude,

the stereotypes and sneers,

Texas’ resolution on being

The Killing Machine,

the loss of friends,

the screams from families who are the new victims,

the children,

the children,

the children,

the contradictions,

the petitions,

all our failures

that made new discoveries,

the love for a brother.

I am covered in a

psychological hurricane

that beats down my brain

and sometimes all I can do is pray

to still the storm, and I have tattoos

that tell stories

my lips can’t!

I feel like an enigma,

because just when I think I’m stable

the slightest thing will

draw my throat tight

and make the tears well in the corner of my eyes.

I can only cast my eyes down and

casually wipe my eyes

stiffen my back

and make it all disappear,

because who could understand what I was feeling!?!

what I have seen!?!

I’m alien in the land of unknown.

and I counted 2 years

and it feels like mere seconds,

but I hold on.

I hold on to

the way I can kiss my grandpa’s cheek

or the way I can lift my daughter

and I realize through all the darkness

there is a light-

even if only candle size-

that can have shattering effects.

so, I flicker on

wavering in the wind gust of

this Texas storm.

8.30.07

is a mantra

bound by rage and love.

4 tattooed with it.

the memory will never succumb.

I remain

with the pain and love

as determined now

as I was then.

unable to stop

this pursuit

of Struggle

we have claimed

as our own!

I am finally blessed to share with all of you one of the greatest pieces of news in my life, though some of you have already heard. Nevertheless, it's something to shout to the roof tops.

It's often hard to celebrate in this place due to the surroundings and also the circumstances, but a man that binds himself to tragedy more than triumph is in a prison far harder that the stone and steel one that encases me.

In my first book ("Tribulation's Eyes) I cite the quote:

"Difficulties show men what they are. In case of any difficulty God has pitted you against a rough antagonist that you may be conqueror, and this cannot be without toil.?

That is a quote that I breathe and spiritually tattoos my skin, because I know it pertains to me. Through everything that I have been through I know there is a greater purpose and everyday it unfolds and each accomplishment is a verification to that fact.

All of this stems from me getting my first contact visit with my daughter Nydesha in 12 years. 12 LONG years! For those that know my story know that the last time I held my daughter she was 8 months old. I have watched her grow up behind glass and only by the Grace and Guidance of God did we grow together regardless of the circumstances. Though separated by glass we did remain connected at the root!

We (me and my family) had been looking for the right time to bring my daughter down for a visit. My grandfather being a former teacher for over 30 years- is never easy on school missing. That's just a rule embedded in him, so I had to haggle with him a bit about getting Nydesha down during school hours. So, we were waiting for the next holiday to approach. But, it dawned upon me that I needed to remind my grandfather to a few things: one was that we should live in the moment. Just as we could not predict the future a year ago we cannot predict the future today, therefore we should enjoy each day to the fullest. And since it has been 12 long years it wouldn't hurt if she missed one day of school for this occasion. The second thing that I had to remind him of (which wasn't easy, but it was necessary) was that this IS prison and that I cannot guarantee my status from-day to day. I would love to be able to promise you all that I'll always be trouble free, but that is not a promise I can or will make. While I can control me, I cannot control my environment. I walk among the hopeless, childish, the criminal minded, the passive, the honest and the devious. At any time anything can happen. It happens all the time. And at the same time I can never predict the action of an officer; officers who bring their personal problems to work and take it out on prisoners. For those that know me, they know that I prefer to die on my feet than live on my knees, so my walk is like that upon a knife's edge. I forever walk cautiously and carefully.

Thankfully the Thanksgiving holiday came. We had made plans for Oct

I am finally blessed to share with all of you one of the greatest pieces of news in my life, though some of you have already heard. Nevertheless, it's something to shout to the roof tops.

It's often hard to celebrate in this place due to the surroundings and also the circumstances, but a man that binds himself to tragedy more than triumph is in a prison far harder that the stone and steel one that encases me.

In my first book ("Tribulation's Eyes) I cite the quote:

"Difficulties show men what they are. In case of any difficulty God has pitted you against a rough antagonist that you may be conqueror, and this cannot be without toil.?

That is a quote that I breathe and spiritually tattoos my skin, because I know it pertains to me. Through everything that I have been through I know there is a greater purpose and everyday it unfolds and each accomplishment is a verification to that fact.

All of this stems from me getting my first contact visit with my daughter Nydesha in 12 years. 12 LONG years! For those that know my story know that the last time I held my daughter she was 8 months old. I have watched her grow up behind glass and only by the Grace and Guidance of God did we grow together regardless of the circumstances. Though separated by glass we did remain connected at the root!

We (me and my family) had been looking for the right time to bring my daughter down for a visit. My grandfather being a former teacher for over 30 years- is never easy on school missing. That's just a rule embedded in him, so I had to haggle with him a bit about getting Nydesha down during school hours. So, we were waiting for the next holiday to approach. But, it dawned upon me that I needed to remind my grandfather to a few things: one was that we should live in the moment. Just as we could not predict the future a year ago we cannot predict the future today, therefore we should enjoy each day to the fullest. And since it has been 12 long years it wouldn't hurt if she missed one day of school for this occasion. The second thing that I had to remind him of (which wasn't easy, but it was necessary) was that this IS prison and that I cannot guarantee my status from-day to day. I would love to be able to promise you all that I'll always be trouble free, but that is not a promise I can or will make. While I can control me, I cannot control my environment. I walk among the hopeless, childish, the criminal minded, the passive, the honest and the devious. At any time anything can happen. It happens all the time. And at the same time I can never predict the action of an officer; officers who bring their personal problems to work and take it out on prisoners. For those that know me, they know that I prefer to die on my feet than live on my knees, so my walk is like that upon a knife's edge. I forever walk cautiously and carefully.

Thankfully the Thanksgiving holiday came. We had made plans for Oct

I am finally blessed to share with all of you one of the greatest pieces of news in my life, though some of you have already heard. Nevertheless, it's something to shout to the roof tops.

It's often hard to celebrate in this place due to the surroundings and also the circumstances, but a man that binds himself to tragedy more than triumph is in a prison far harder that the stone and steel one that encases me.

In my first book ("Tribulation's Eyes) I cite the quote:

"Difficulties show men what they are. In case of any difficulty God has pitted you against a rough antagonist that you may be conqueror, and this cannot be without toil.?

That is a quote that I breathe and spiritually tattoos my skin, because I know it pertains to me. Through everything that I have been through I know there is a greater purpose and everyday it unfolds and each accomplishment is a verification to that fact.

All of this stems from me getting my first contact visit with my daughter Nydesha in 12 years. 12 LONG years! For those that know my story know that the last time I held my daughter she was 8 months old. I have watched her grow up behind glass and only by the Grace and Guidance of God did we grow together regardless of the circumstances. Though separated by glass we did remain connected at the root!

We (me and my family) had been looking for the right time to bring my daughter down for a visit. My grandfather being a former teacher for over 30 years- is never easy on school missing. That's just a rule embedded in him, so I had to haggle with him a bit about getting Nydesha down during school hours. So, we were waiting for the next holiday to approach. But, it dawned upon me that I needed to remind my grandfather to a few things: one was that we should live in the moment. Just as we could not predict the future a year ago we cannot predict the future today, therefore we should enjoy each day to the fullest. And since it has been 12 long years it wouldn't hurt if she missed one day of school for this occasion. The second thing that I had to remind him of (which wasn't easy, but it was necessary) was that this IS prison and that I cannot guarantee my status from-day to day. I would love to be able to promise you all that I'll always be trouble free, but that is not a promise I can or will make. While I can control me, I cannot control my environment. I walk among the hopeless, childish, the criminal minded, the passive, the honest and the devious. At any time anything can happen. It happens all the time. And at the same time I can never predict the action of an officer; officers who bring their personal problems to work and take it out on prisoners. For those that know me, they know that I prefer to die on my feet than live on my knees, so my walk is like that upon a knife's edge. I forever walk cautiously and carefully.

Thankfully the Thanksgiving holiday came. We had made plans for Oct

I am finally blessed to share with all of you one of the greatest pieces of news in my life, though some of you have already heard. Nevertheless, it's something to shout to the roof tops.

It's often hard to celebrate in this place due to the surroundings and also the circumstances, but a man that binds himself to tragedy more than triumph is in a prison far harder that the stone and steel one that encases me.

In my first book ("Tribulation's Eyes) I cite the quote:

"Difficulties show men what they are. In case of any difficulty God has pitted you against a rough antagonist that you may be conqueror, and this cannot be without toil.”

That is a quote that I breathe and spiritually tattoos my skin, because I know it pertains to me. Through everything that I have been through I know there is a greater purpose and everyday it unfolds and each accomplishment is a verification to that fact.

All of this stems from me getting my first contact visit with my daughter Nydesha in 12 years. 12 LONG years! For those that know my story know that the last time I held my daughter she was 8 months old. I have watched her grow up behind glass and only by the Grace and Guidance of God did we grow together regardless of the circumstances. Though separated by glass we did remain connected at the root!

We (me and my family) had been looking for the right time to bring my daughter down for a visit. My grandfather being a former teacher for over 30 years- is never easy on school missing. That's just a rule embedded in him, so I had to haggle with him a bit about getting Nydesha down during school hours. So, we were waiting for the next holiday to approach. But, it dawned upon me that I needed to remind my grandfather to a few things: one was that we should live in the moment. Just as we could not predict the future a year ago we cannot predict the future today, therefore we should enjoy each day to the fullest. And since it has been 12 long years it wouldn't hurt if she missed one day of school for this occasion. The second thing that I had to remind him of (which wasn't easy, but it was necessary) was that this IS prison and that I cannot guarantee my status from-day to day. I would love to be able to promise you all that I'll always be trouble free, but that is not a promise I can or will make. While I can control me, I cannot control my environment. I walk among the hopeless, childish, the criminal minded, the passive, the honest and the devious. At any time anything can happen. It happens all the time. And at the same time I can never predict the action of an officer; officers who bring their personal problems to work and take it out on prisoners. For those that know me, they know that I prefer to die on my feet than live on my knees, so my walk is like that upon a knife's edge. I forever walk cautiously and carefully.

Thankfully the Thanksgiving holid

Hello everyone ? For the last 12 years Kenneth Foster has been isolated in his cell for at least 22 hours per day either on death row in solitary confinement (11 years) or for the last 1 year housed in the most restrictive unit available at the McConnell Unit. I am happy to report that finally, after one year of having his sentence commuted he has been granted level G2 status and is in general population at the McConnell Unit. He is FINALLY allowed contact visits and he had his first today with his Grandfather.  His Grandfather told me that he cannot describe in words the excitement that Kenneth had. He is also now assigned a job and is working in the kitchen. I will share more details as they arrive.

Best,

Adam

If you haven't already please check out Kenneth's spoken word poem!

Thank-you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Zkkbzg0TY

If you haven't already please check out Kenneth's spoken word poem!

Thank-you

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Zkkbzg0TY

If you haven't already.. please take a look at this article doen by fellow Activists and long time friends of Kenneth's... Christy and Dee!!

Thank-you

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/782239/_interview_with_christy_death_penalty.html?cat=49

As I look out my window?.the building looks just like death row. I can?t help but to stare at it. The building is the same. The windows are the same. Even the area surrounding it is almost identical. I can?t seem to take my eyes off the building. I watch it as if it was going to jump out the way. But it doesn?t. It?s the same concrete and steel that I?ve known for 11 years now. And as I look at this building- that looks exactly like death row- I ask myself: How are you?

The conversations between Me, My/Self and I continue, because I learned long ago that if one can?t fraternize with its own soul then they are doomed to a far worse torment than the prison system. Prisons and hells are internal as well as external. I find that I am repeatedly asking my Self- How are you? Are you ok? Are you healing? I look at myself in the mirror and I ask my Self- How traumatized are you? I?ve been tough, I?ve been strong, I?ve endured, I?ve smiled when I wanted to cry and cried when I didn?t have the slightest damn idea why. I know there are scars! I know there are issues! I can?t deny that nor suppress it. We do that enough on death row. But I?m not on death row anymore, although the ?god(s)? don?t seem to want to let me forget that.

What exactly am I talking about, you might be asking? I?m talking about the building that sits RIGHT outside my window. I?m currently on McConnell Unit in Beeville, TX, but you could have fooled me. In the mid-90?s when Texas was having its prison boom it used the same blueprints to build several prisons. Therefore, the same exact blueprint that was used to make Polunsky Unit was used to build McConnell Unit. When my family walks into McConnell it?s just like walking into Polunsky. The visiting rooms are identical. The Unit?s structure is the same. So are the names of the buildings. What kind of sick game is this? I left death row and turned around and came right back to?..what looks like death row.

BUT?..I?m not on 12 building. I?m on 8 building. However, right outside my window is?..12 building. Except when I look at this building I don?t see 12 building at McConnell Unit, I see 12 building death row. I know those windows like the palms of my hands. Those windows which you can?t open. They are narrow and you can only see out. I peered through those windows for 7 years and now?.they peer at me. 12 building here is for Ad Seg inmates. But, I don?t see that. When I look at this building I see Tony and Gabriel. I think of F-Pod and familiar officers. I think I smell pepper spray. My mind is playing tricks on me. I blink my eyes, but I keep looking at the building. It?s like I?m in a gotdamn trance. I?m getting upset, so I pull away.

What trauma have I endured? What?s going on with my mind? Outside I am free of death row, but inside it?s still gnawing at me. It?s like nails running across the chalk board. What good does physical liberation do if my soul is chained in an abyss?

Since I left there?s been 3 executions and 2 suicides. I wake up in a cell that looks just like my cell on Polunsky except it has 2 bunks and I have a cell mate. Nevertheless, I still expect someone I know to be going out the door with a date. When I walk to the visiting room I still can see families lined up giving their last goodbyes. It?s vivid! The rage steams through my body.

I?m not ok! I need to verbalize that. I?M NOT OK! I need to hear it coming out my mouth! In a short time I?ve been faced with some challenges here. Locations change, but oppression under TDC and the struggle doesn?t. When I got engaged in my rebellion here I thought to myself?.I know they?ll retaliate. I?m sure I?ll end up in Ad Seg! Shit! Then I?ll be right back where I started. The single man recreation. The cuffs everywhere you go. The isolation. 12 building! What a sick joke that is! Could I do it again? 4 years? 6? 7? My soul grunts at the thought of it.

Down south the fog comes a lot in the morning. I rise, as always, around 7ish. I open my window and look out. 12 building is almost covered, but I can catch a light or two on shining from the building looking like the yellow eyes of the demon dog from hell. I can?t help but to think about what I left behind, what I endured and what others are still enduring today. They question if the death penalty is cruel and unusual punishment. Albert Camus said:

?Capital Punishment is the most premeditated of murders, to which no criminal?s deed, however calculated, can be compared! For there to be equivalency, the death penalty would have to punish a criminal who had warned his victim of the date at which he would inflict a horrible death on him and who, from that moment onward, had confined him at his mercy for months. Such a monster is not encountered in private life.?

As a child I was scared of the dark (like most children) ? too many scary movies. You always thought a monster lurked down the hall, so you?d run to turn on the light. And run back! I should have been a track star. But, to who does the death row inmate run? To God? Maybe! ?Christian? politicians who cry for blood don?t give God a good name. Why is brutality made to look so good in amerika?

It seems I?m still running from the monster. These thoughts spark as I read Primo Levi?s ?Survival in Auschwitz.? People wonder why we would compare death row to a concentration camp- because it?s all the same. It?s death! It?s oppression! For the many that entered- not as many would leave. And for those that survived, it was a miracle. Like those in the camps, they struggled to live one more day. They held on that?.maybe today will be the day I get out. Like them, we have the same thoughts. Just one more appeal, just one more exoneration. Death rows are the Auschwitz?s of the West! Ye gods! What games do you play to torment us mortals?

Self spoke to me today. Self said that I had to toughen up, that I could not come this far and falter. Self feels my knees wobble and heart race. Self knows that I?ve been looking out the window too much. I turn to Self and remind it (in the words of Nietzsche): ?Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And when you look long into the abyss, the abyss also looks into you.?

I?ve been regurgitated out the whale, you see! And it seems?. That I too (like Captain Ahab) have become obsessed with the whale. Yes, I?m obsessed with its capture! I?m obsessed with its demise! I cannot sleep. My mind is unable to rest. I?ve been through a war. I suffer from everything that Vietnam and Iraq veterans do. We?ve had something stolen from us. The government doesn?t care- no thief does.

There?s no therapy for me, though. No couch! No group talks! My teachers remain buried in the history of tragic struggles. But, revolution is born of tragedy, is it not?! I have a bitter-sweet fruit to consume. I have meditations to continue: new mantras and chants to conjure up that will give me new answers filled with new strengths.

But for now, the Tango continues. What was once a very intimate dance- body to body, face to face, we now dance apart, but still our arms and eyes remain locked upon each other. Our eyes do not part. The tango is very intimate.

And so, as I search to heal, search to understand?I take another glance out the window, There?s not a smile and there?s not a tear, but there is a knowing. You can crush a rose, but its fragrance will remain. And death row- my fragrance continues. As we keep the fight going, death row, know that I?ll never accept less? I?ll give no less than everything?even if everything is less than what I was expecting? I?ll settle for nothing less.

Yes, the struggle does continue, and yes, I do remain (though crushed) the rose that won?t stop emanating from the concrete!

Straight Ahead!

Surviving?

Haramia KiNassor

2/17/08 4:24 PM

Friends,

we have received some disturbing news from our comrade Kenneth Foster Jr., who was commuted off of death row on August 30th 2007 and since then housed at the McConnell Unit in Beeville, TX.   Kenneth has alerted me that he and many of the men he is stationed with in Close Custody have been repeatedly denied their recreation time.  This is in direct violation with TDCJ policy and constitutes inhumane treatment of inmates.  Men have gone days at a time without leaving their cells.  Kenneth expressed to me that this isolation has 'driven him to the breaking point' and he is 'about to go off'. 

Kenneth has asked us to relay a plea for support from his comrades, abolitionists and supporters.  Attached is a sample letter, or petition of grievance that can be either directly copied or personalized and then mailed in to the attached addresses.  This is a small step toward improving the day-to-day experiences of our fighters on the inside and is a gesture that would be greatly appreciated.   An individual complaint should be mailed to each of the 6 addresses.   If you are able to help in this matter, reply to this E-mail to better track  the grievance process.

I have asked that Kenneth keep us updated on the treatment of his level and to supply further details into this matter.  On a positive note, I visited with Kenneth just before the new year and he was in good health and has a sharp focus on our future struggles. 

Toward Abolition,

Laura Brady and the KFSG

PETITION DRAFT LETTER:

Dear Sir-

We would like to bring to your attention a very serious issue that we would like your attention and intervention on.  It is involving situations that we feel involve violations of TDC Policy and also abuse of authority and indifference toward humane treatment.

We send you this petition on the behalf of men stationed on Close Custody (8 building, section K1 & 2) on the McConnell Unit in Beeville, TX.

This petition stems from the fact that men on Close Custody are purposely being denied their recreation privileges by the McConnell Administration.  It seems that the reasons being given are not justified and from a consensus  of what the officers say (relayed from the offenders there) is that this is being done strictly because they are Close Custody.  While Close Custody may have lesser privileges than the rest of the Unit, without a doubt they are due what is allotted by TDC Policy.

On a consistent basis men are being denied recreation.  Two reasons (one of the two or sometimes both) are given:

-weather is too bad for outside recreation
-lack of staff

While these reasons are given there are alternative routes to give the offenders recreation.

When weather is too bad for outside recreation the offenders have requested, as allotted to them by policy, dayroom recreation.  Every Sergeant that works 8 building has told them that they do not get dayroom recreation, that there is no substitute when outside recreation is cancelled or that dayroom is not recreation.  As we will show- this is contrary to policy.

*Page 32 of the TDCJ Offender Orientation Handbook says:

c) G5 Custody Offenders will be allowed two (2) hours each day.

It also states that:

Non-programmatic recreation activities may include:
*Dayroom games such as chess, checkers and dominoes.

So, it is clear that Policy states that dayroom is recreation.
In addition:

*Page 7 of the Disciplinary Rules and Procedures states:
a. recreation-dayroom, gymnasium and outdoor recreation yard.

Therefore, McConnell Unit's Staff's statement that dayroom is not recreation is false.
Please take note that policy does not say what time Close Custody should get recreation.  The Staff there has enforced a morning ONLY time and refuse to substitute for a later time if the weather clears.

We would like to point out that on K-pod (where Clsoe Custody is held) there are 3 sections: 1 and 2 are Clsoe Custody, but section 3 is Medium Custody.  On days when weather is good, but the Administration states that they have a lack of Staff, 3 section gets their full privileges:

-they walk to chow
-they get their outside recreation
-they get their dayroom time

However, McConnell's Administration states they don't have officers to watch the inmates.  Close Custody only gets 2 hours a day, whereas Medium Custody gets most of the day.  How is it feasible that one section of offenders cannot be watched at the same time that another- directly next to it- is being watched?  It's obvious that what is being done is being done to Close Custody in an arbitrary fashion, it's being done to lessen the work of the officers and it's being done in disregard to what these men are due.

Close Custody offenders have begun grieving this process.  They have stated what we have stated in this petition to you, yet nothing has changed.  You can check grievance records, Step 1's have been denied and Step 2's are in motion.  We would like to know why the McConnell Wardens are ignoring this situation.

We would also like to say that we feel that as long as offenders are following Policy that they should be treated fairly and given what they are due.  McConnell Unit was just on lockdown from November 13, 2007-December 31, 2007.  They were allowed recreation on January 1, 2008.  They were denied recreation on January 2, 2008.  They were given inside recreation on the 3rd and 4th and then denied recreation on the 5th, 6th and 7th of January.  This is borderline cruel and unusual punishment when you force men to stay in a cell (with a cellmate) for 24 hours straight (when it's not a threat to security- we understand that during lockdowns this must be endured, but nevertheless it is still a harsh treatment). 

We are asking you to intervene before these offenders can no longer endure and we are asking you to intervene because it is right.  If an offender breaks the rules he will be punished according to your Policy.  We ask that the Policy be followed all of the time and not just when it's convenient for the Unit.  We hope that you will correct this problem and also give us a written response on this matter.  Thank you for your time. 

PETITION ADDRESSES:

Doug Dretke, Director
TDCJ
PO Box 99
Huntsville, TX 77342

Brad Livingston
TDCJ
PO Box 99
Huntsville, TX 77342

Kathy Cleere, Ombudsman Coordinator
TDCJ
PO Box 99
Huntsville, TX 77342

TDCJ-Office Inspector General
PO Box 4003
Huntsville, TX 77342

Keith Clendennen
Administrator for Offender Grievances
PO Box 99
Huntsville, TX 77320

TDCJ-CID Region IV (Mr. Castro)
HCO2 Box 965
Beeville, TX 78102

I wanted to sit down and address a few people directly, because I think it's important to give thanks to those that made this victory possible. If it wasn't for certain people I know I would not be alive today.

First and foremost, I give praise and thanks to The Most High for giving me the strength to carry on through all these years for I know that I didn't do it by myself. I've watched too many men give up, condemn themselves, mutilate themselves, try to commit suicide and then there was those that did commit it. When we say that we live in a hell the description is pretty close. I didn't just start praying when I got this date. I've been striving towards spiritual attainment for a LONG time. But, prayer takes time and it does work.

Without the support and love of my grandparents and Uncle Lloyd I wouldn't be here. They've been the rock foundation to my house since DAY ONE! There were here when it started and they were here at the end. Much of who I am today is because of them and I have a life long service of betterment dedicated to them. And to my daughter for being the warrior princess she is. Her love made and kept me.

I have to give an unmatched love to my wife who has been by my side for over 2 years now; a person whom when was hated on she just found a way to dig in harder! No relationship is perfect, but through the fire we just become more purified. We've rolled with all the punches and if we've made it this far then there is no stopping or turning back.

Much love to my dad for stepping up when it counted. The same to my cousin Beverly Fisher whom rallied the troops. Big love to all my cousins, Aunts and Uncles that came to my side. You all touched my heart in a MAJOR way. Thank you for being there, because your vibes kept me positive.

Then I've got to give HUGE props to my good friend Adam Axel for doing amazing things. This young man has done some things that probably many of you don't realize. This guy was literally like a central command for me. You all have no idea. He acted as a central station to get me messages/letters/printouts/emails/updates from all over the world. Almost weekly I was getting 100 page Fed-X packages. Outside of the general campaign work he went above and beyond what was expected. I was definitely blessed to have you on my side. Outside of the work he kept me level headed and inspired. He's got a great future ahead of him.

And have no doubts about it I have to extend gigantic revolutionary greetings to the vanguard of the anti-death penalty movement the CEDP! These people are gladiators when it comes to grassroots activism and they definitely were the force behind this frontline. Bryan McCann  you definitely helped us move mountains, and the whole Austin crew (Randi, Stefanie, Laura, Dana and the other comrades). We did this from Coast to Coast - made the people hear us. These other so called anti death penalty groups need to take some notes from how this group moves and functions for if they followed suit we may be able to abolish this death penalty very shortly. Just think that if all the anti death penalty groups moved in this fashion. It's time to revamp their strategies. Use the CEDP as an example  they ARE the vanguard.

While there's no other groups that I can extend that type of thanks to there are individuals of groups that I'd like to thank for showing me some great support and solidarity. Big props goes to Steve Hall for making some big things happen. Thanks to Scott Cobb for holding an event on my behalf and also to Dave Atwood for being there. All of this played a role in this victory.

And from the top of my heart let me say that the love and support of Mary Felps and her crew helped me get where I am today. I was visited weekly by JoAnne Scott. They did to the best of their ability all they could for me. Much of that credit goes to her assistant JoAnne who mailed, typed, editted and so on. She definitely was a crutch that held me up. She is also the person that got Sean Paul Kelley on our team. Mary did amazing work through writing folks and did me a great service through an Amicus for Clemency to the Parole Board. There's much more too, but some things I'll just be taking to the grave with me one day (smile). They are amazing people.

I want to end with giving respect to some media channels that did me a great service: Pacifica, Forth Worth Star Telegram, Austin Statesman, Dallas Morning News. I want to specially thank KXAN for covering this story in a fair way. They were very much the professionals. I think these people gave extra support my way and they must know that I'm not going to let them down. There was so many petitions that I can't name them all. I must give much love to June and her Italian Film crew who tirelessly covered this fight. To Chiara and the crew - I love you all too. I know I'm missing some folks by name  but I got you in my heart.

I especially got those in my heart that some of you never knew, but has been here for years like my god-mum Christine in England who helped me know love in new ways. Petra with ALIVE in germany. Grazia with PRC in Italy, who helped me with Sheila Murphy. And yes, I owe Sheila Murphy so much for if nothing else being a spiritual friend. But she did an amazing Amicus Brief and we all owe ArchBishop Desmond Tutu so much love for supporting us. My French girls did amazing things - Emilie, Vi, Fatou, Kadia. Can't leave out my amazing web-master Ms. Jennie. That site was the heart of this body and she ran it like a pro!

This has turned into a book, but it was necessary. My heart in overflooded with love and gratitude.

A special thanks goes to Sheila Murphy, Andrew Lofthouse, Tom Cahill and Archbishop Desmond Tutu for there work on the Amicus Brief that was submitted to the US Supreme Court.

I haven't forgotten you, Keith Hampton. Though you gave me the blues on more occasions than I can name you stuck in there and kept me alive for 10 years where I could build this support team that helped make this happen. I've seen guys get to death row AFTER me and be done with their appeals and executed in 6 years. So, I'm thankful for the motions, supplements, Certs, motions (again,) rehearings etc.. that you filed.

Let it be known that I'm still not done fighting. As I've said  as long as I have breath then freedom is within my grasp. I fully believe that it is not my destiny to spend the rest of these years in prison, though I know that being here for a minute is part of what I was called to do. My place is out there with you all working for this Struggle. For now I will do it from within here. But trust me, my gears have not stopped spinning on how to gain my freedom. (You should see the smile on my face right now.)

I exit this message with nothing but love on my lips, but you will hear from me again. I have a new environment to adjust to, but I won't let one minute slip past me. I have so much that I want to pursue and do. And it will be done!

Peace, Love and Respect to you all. Somebody send Mr. Rick Perry a complimentary DRIVE tshirt for me as a token of my deep gratitude!

Always, your soldier on the battlefield!
Kenneth"

"Resurrection: August 30th, 2007

Like thieves in the night they swooped me up. It was the eve of my own State sanctioned murder, approximately 8:20 PM and I was listening to shout-outs pour in to me on 96.1 KDOL. Unexpectedly, there was a knock at my cell door. There stood a death row Lieutenant and 2 Wardens (Simmons and Hirch.) "Strip out!" was the Lieutenant's order. "For what reason?" I responded. "Because we told you to" was all that I got back. Having no idea what the situation could be I complied with the order. Though I was being provoked I didn't want to act before knowing what the situation was. I stripped out and exited the cell. I could feel in my bones that something wasn't right. And as we exited the pod my feelings were true - there waiting for me was a 5 man extraction team and all of the shift supervisors (several Sergeants) and to top it off several plain clothed people (at first I thought these were Sheriffs, but later found out that it was the TDC Regional Director Mr. Treon and the Warden from the Walls Unit.) As soon as I set my eyes on this circus like spectacle I immediately dropped to the ground and announced that I wasn't going anywhere until somebody told me where I was going and why. In his typical tyranical rage Warden Hirch said  "I told you we'd tell you when you got up the hallway." I told him that if he wanted me to cooperate with him that he needed to give me some understanding to what was going on and that's when he told me that I was being taken to the Walls Unit right then. I needed a minute to think, so I stood up. By this time I had ankle chains on, so I began shuffling down the hallway. I was placed in an isolated cage and was again told to strip down. I saw this as nothing but a degrading process and I began to voice that. I looked at the Lieutenant and told him that all he was doing he just did 5 minutes ago and that all this was being done just to provoke me and degrade me. I put on the clothes they gave me and was cuffed again and as soon as I stepped out that cage I laid down in protest. I emphatically stated that I was not going to participate in what they were trying to do to me. I told them that I would not dignify this lynch show. I told them the only thing that I could and that is that they were terrorists and they were only terrorizing. It wasn't bad enough that I was set to die the next day, but I was basically being terrorized in the middle of the night. I was chained all the way up and placed on a stretcher and i was carried to a dark tinted van where I was loaded in the back. I saw other death row prisoners watching me through their windows. I could only hope that word would get to my DRIVE comrades. There is no doubt that DRIVE planned to be in motion with civil disobedience against the wrongful murder that was sitting over my head and alongside of that vibe of resistance was a lot of rumors about something violent to take place. I did the best I could talking to the Staff assuring them that DRIVE does not condone violence in regards to this Struggle, but nevertheless extreme precautions were taken. And it wasn't just the vibe of DRIVE that was felt, there was a whole other vibe that was being felt and that was the disapproval of the people. There was social discontent being exuded and the system felt it. And that led to this expedition.

I was loaded into the van and ran smack into a 4 car SWAT team escort to the Walls Unit. We had a caravan on our way there and there were a lot of officers armed to the teeth with handguns, shotguns, assault rifles in every car. There was enough arsenal to wage a small war. Though I was sickened by the whole process I can't lie and say that I didn't feel that every execution should have this type of security concern. There is no way that people should be able to be friendly while being escorted down the road and murdered. What this proved to me is that when the people rise up their strength will be acknowledged.

It was about a 45 minute drive to Huntsville. I silently watched the street signs as I went. We arrived at the Walls, a Unit that resembled more of a College than a prison. It seemed that I was taken into the heart of the Unit somewhere deep behind a maze of streets and buildings. I could only think in my mind that they was taking me to the death chamber, the place that had taken so many men that I knew. As the van backed up and they opened the door to take me out, I would not walk, so they gladly packed me into the death house. I was dropped on the floor, my wrists were in excruciating pain. I was being told to stand up, but I would not. I only grabbed my wrists which were now bruised and hurting. I looked around the room and I was surrounded by approximately 10 officers and while I wanted to continue to resist, I took great notice that no use of force camera was rolling. I felt the set up, thus I didn't give them what they wanted. I allowed myself to be fingerprinted and then I was placed in the death watch cell.

After I gained my composure I surveyed the room. It was one of the most intensely cold and numb places I had ever seen. It was a narrow room with about 4 other cells. I was in the very first - just a few steps away from the death chamber. In front of my cell was a long table with drink containers and several Bibles. Straight up - it was like a funeral home. I couldn't help but to again look towards the death chamber. It was a big steel door with a square window at the top. It was a one way mirror, so one could not see in. I just stared at it. I couldn't help but to think about my good friend John Amador that was just executed hours before. I felt his presence with me. I thought of his last words which were so profound. I was in the Texas catacomb and yet while i was there i didn't feel death calling me.

I began pacing my cell for a moment. The Unit Wardens spoke to me and were very respectful. They offered me food and drink, but I refused. For years I had been living off of polluted TDC faucet water, so polluted TDC faucet water would do me just fine then. Slowly but surely my property was gone through and give to me piece by piece. I then began to sort through my property and divide it up for my family (just in case.) Once I got things pretty situation I remembered that I had something to do for my wife  I had a letter to read that she had specifically wrote for me if I got to the point that I didn't feel I'd get a stay. Though that feeling had never hit me 100% I felt that this time was as good as any. I reached into her folder and grabbed the letter that she had written: "You cannot read this unless you are not granted a stay. Open/read this no earlier than the morning of August 30th" on the front. While I wasn't unsure of the stay it was approximately 2:30 in the morning of August 30th and I was across from the death chamber, so I felt now was the time to read that letter. What I opened to was one of the best love letters of my life. In no way did it feel like a goodbye  letter and in fact was an - I will see you later  letter. My wife and I are resolute on the fact that we are soul mates and no matter in this life or the next we will continually swirl around each other. Her letter did nothing short of hold me up during this time. It was a beautiful speech made to the man whose heart only she understands. And I was at peace with it. Something in me told me that those would not be our last love letters.

I finished getting situated around 3:30 AM and fell into a hard sleep. But, I could not sleep long. I was up by 6:30 AM. I woke feeling nothing but love in my bones. It was such an amazing feeling, because even though I stood hours away from my scheduled execution I didn't feel any fear. I just felt love surrounding my body and stood head up as I had been doing. I washed up, but was allowed a shower around 7:30. By the time I finished and got dressed I was ready to go see my family at visit. I was ready to face the day head on.

I started off my visits with my most beloved revolutionary sister and brother Walidah Imarisha and Ray Ramirez. I only had 4 hours to visit with everyone, so we knew that our exchange would be short and sweet. I was already in the mindset that I wouldn't be doing any goodbyes, but right off the bat the latest media news was what was at hand. Reports of the New York Times, Chicago Tribune, Los Angeles Times  plus more - was the topics. Movement, movement and more movement was all we had to talk about. There was no time for goodbyes. We wrapped up our visit in about 40 minutes and we ended with fist in the air and revolutionary salutes. My next visit would be with my childhood cousin Beverly Fisher and close friend from France Emilie Artaud. I hadn't seen my cousin in over 11 years, so that was such a warming thing. Again - no time for goodbyes - news of activism in France and mobilization for the day. Things were positive and as my friend Emilie was ready to leave we exchanged smiles. Up next was the man himself, my super star point guard of the team Adam Axel. Here is a young man that was able to move mountains and I have no doubts that if it wasn't for him, I might not be where I am today. His efforts alongside of the CEDP proved to be life savers. Our visit was so very upbeat and nothing but victory was tapping at our minds. My father found his way in inbetween everyone else and I have never seen my father so alive and positive. His mind was already convinced that victory was ours and no one or nothing could convince him to otherwise. We all had good talks and as those visits winded down my wife and my grandparents came in. Everything was joyous. It had been years since I had seen my grandmother and though ailing with Alzheimer's she was as beautiful as ever to me. In fact  everything was beautiful. Not once did we feel a need for a goodbye, so after I spoke with my grandfather he departed the visiting room with my grandmother just leaving me and my wife. There we sat hand in hand, eye to eye talking about this future that we had together. We talked and talked. I told her about her letter that I read and we just gave a knowing smile to each other. We had decided to spend the last hour with each other and as the time got closer to 12noon I noticed my father walking up to our booth. Neither of us was expecting that, so we looked over to him as he approached and when he got near us he just threw his fist in the air and screamed - "^, 1!!!" He yelled to me that the Board had voted 6-1 in my favor. Next to my wifes screams for joy all I could do was let off a grin from ear to ear. As my wife and father embraced I could only tell my father to give her a kiss for me. And while my father was saying that it was all up to the Governor at that point I knew that there was no more guessing to it. When the Board didn't deliver their decision on the 28th as planned I knew that something greater was in the works. I knew that they were feeling the pressure and would want to consult with the higher ups. As I told my supporters - if the decision comes back negative it's over. That would be a sign that nothing else would go for me. But... if it comes back in my favor I knew that it had been decided that I would live. So, when that 6-1 came down I knew that victory was mine. My father left the visitation room leaving me and my wife to rejoice amongst each other. We gave each other kisses and I pointed something out to her. I told her that I was always looking for the signs from God. Once upon a time as a youth I didn't know how to pay attention, though I was always getting signs. Now I'm very much more alert. And while I had been getting mixed signals from all the bad dreams my closest friends were having one sign came right before I left the death chamber to go to visit. The night before when all my property was taken and searched they took all the shoe strings from my shoes. I had not known this, because they kept my shoes and said that they would give them to me when I went to visit. So, that morning before visit I told them that I had some tennis shoes and some boots and that I would like my boots. As I got dressed and my boots were handed to me and I saw the missing laces I could only crack a very wide smile, because my mind drifted to my poem "The Final Call" where I start saying:

"I'm coming
straight off death row in
boots with no laces."

I pointed this out to them and before I closed my visit with my wife I reminded her  I'm coming straight off death row. She replied emphasizing "OFF!" I smiled and concurred. "Yes, OFF!" We ended our visit with a kiss from behind the glass and I was escorted back to the death chamber. As I was placed in the cell I spoke to some of the rank that was around me. I let one of them know why my family was so excited. I know that they were monitoring all attitudes, actions and behaviors, so I wanted them to know why my family got so excited. The guard looked back at me and said "well, today just might be your day." No sooner than he said that the Warden walked through the door on his cell phone. He looked at me and said, "They're commuting your sentence." I guess I was kind of surprised that he told me just like that, so I was like, "That's it? It's done?" He said, "Yeah, your sentence was just commuted. We'll have you out of here in just a few." My head was tingling and I wasted no time to drop to my knees and say a little prayer of thanks to the Most High, because I knew that He had had His hands around this situation. A few minutes later I was headed back to Polunsky.

On the drive back everything seemed brand new. Even officers were telling me that I had a new chance at life and I knew that. The sky was brighter and my heart was lighter. I got back to Polunsky Unit and was just hoping to be able to get around some comrades. While I was in a holding cell I had the fortune to see my best friend and mentor Tony Ford pass by and he had a smile so big on his face that I would have swore he had 2 mouths. That was a perfect passing, because that was my best friend and I'm glad he got to see my face before I left. I was placed on a pod where I only stayed about 30 minutes. As I walked through the door there was an elder comrade of mine in the dayroom - Harvey Earvin - and I went up to the bars and let him hug me. I went into the cell and had only enough time for about 3 persons to send me short kites of congratulations. And in no time a team came to pick me up. They wanted me OFF death row and I was ready to go. In just that fast of time I was being moved off death row and sent to the Byrd Unit to be reprocessed as a general population prisoner. Having had an international campaign, an armed SWAT team escort and a political commutation there wasn't too many people that didn't know who I was. Most had good things to say to me and one guard even came up to me and asked how I was being treated. I told him that I was being treated ok thus far. Not knowing if this was a man of importance I asked him who he was. He simply replied  "Just an officer." But then he added in  "I listen to KPFT everyday. And Democracy Now!" I could only smile and say - "Right on, brotha!"

And Right On it has been. After a 10 year battle of fighting the daeth penalty I can finally sit back and breathe a bit. I can finally let off a small sigh. I've said if from the beginning that as long as the battle was on that I couldn't do that. And though the war isn't over a huge battle has been won and I can finally sit back and exhale and even let go a few tears of joy  joyous tears that say that I'm going to continue to have the fuel to do positive and great things. I have so many to live for  so manny that didn't get the chance to carry on that greatness they attained while on death row. I can't speak for the men that have gotten off death row before me, but I know that I'm ready to do something phenomenal. This will not be a wasted opportunity. So many people stood by my side, supported me and believed in me and I owe them something. I owe them 100% effort and dedication to the struggle we merged in on.

I can't help but to think about those I left behind - the others that now sit on death watch. This has been such a traumatic journey and there are so many pains and scars. I hope that my fight has given some new hope to the struggle showing that the impossible can be done. And if it ever happens once it can happen again - and it must! History was made on August 30, 2007 and it's this day that I pray HOPE was resurrected amongst our fighters in an otherwise grim minded people where over 400 murders have brutalized us. Today is a new day and we're taking Texas by the horns and we're not letting go. We can't let go until we break the beast and I can't help but to end in the same way that I ended my almost prophetic poem "The Final Call":

"These words are a prose of focus on death row... of letting go of the fear and hate of Selves... let's take it off the shelves and activate the way... the way today is leaving the gates... and the point I was trying to make it - I'M COMING STRAIGHT OFF DEATH ROW!"

After the board or paroles and pardons voted 6-1 in Kenneth's favour, Texas governor Rick Perry granted Kenneth a commutation of sentance to life without parole. The descision came Thursday, around 6 hours before the sheduled execution.

"After carefully considering the facts of this case, along with the recommendations from the Board of Pardons and Paroles, I believe the right and just decision is to commute Foster's sentence from the death penalty to life imprisonment," Perry said in a statement. The Republican governor added, "I am concerned about Texas law that allows capital murder defendants to be tried simultaneously, and it is an issue I think the Legislature should examine."

?It makes me feel wonderful,? said Mr. Foster?s father, Kenneth Foster Sr., who had been visiting his son with other family members just before word of the governor?s action came and held a raucous celebration with supporters outside the walls of the death house in Huntsville.

Norma LaHood, the murder victim?s mother, said she took the news of the commutation as divine will. ?I?m filled with peace,? Mrs. LaHood said by telephone from San Antonio. ?I will mourn my son till I die, but I?m not forced any more to relive his death.?

"Hey everyone!! I want to thank EVERYONE that was able to make it to the park and assist us in our effortts to raise awareness!!! I think that it went really well. I know that some couldn?t make it for various reasons, but I appreciate all those that did. We got about 13 pages of signatures and passed out loads of information!! A lot of people were unaware of the way the State of Texas works as far as "justice" goes." ~ Beverly Fisher

"July 9th, Lawrence, Kenneth Sr., and Ray of the Welfare Poets were on the air July 9th on NYC Pacifica station, and they did a GREAT job!! Not only did they paint a picture of how unjust the Law of Parties is, and the bias surrounding the trial itself, but they also made a powerful case for why struggle and action will be the key in stopping the execution... including mentioning the march in Austin on July 21 and our community forum in Harlem on July 26.
The host was very supportive and said they will post information on Kenneth and the Governor?s phone numbers on their website, and she mentioned that she had spent the weekend reading Kenneth?s poetry and writings , and committed to coming out on the 26th.
Just to give people a sense of the radio station?s profile, the show the Fosters were on has a good number of listeners; film-maker Michael Moore went on a few minutes later to talk about his movie "Sicko," so this is no small program!
So we?ll keep working on the outreach here.
Solidarity from NYC -- ~ Lee, CEDP"

The Italians, who were there not too long ago to interview Kenneth and a bunch of the family members - and also there to film the wedding, came over to see me (Tasha) and filmed me in my hometown Rotterdam. There also filmed my parents, sister and some of my friends. They will soon be going to the United States again and they will talk to Nicole, Nydesha and some people that grew up in San Antonio just to see what life out there is like. They will come back, if the execution does not get halted soon, in August to film how we all battle through this. They are also working on getting a trailer for Kenneth on the channel, to get people to campaign for Kenneth, write letters, make calls etc. They are currently awaiting a full ?go? on that.  ~ Tasha

Catherina Welsh from the Critical Resistance organization in New Orleans put flyers together to distribute in New Orleans and at the U.S. Social Forum in ATL. She used Kenneth?s poetry (his poem, lets start organizing) as his voice.

On Sunday, July 22 Tasha will do an interview with George Cadman host of ?Peace Talks? FRSC 101.1 fm (CA). It will be mostly about Kenneth as a person and his case."